Military Service and Its Effect On Time With Loved Ones
Command Sergeant Major Chris Miller has dedicated 24 years of service to the nation, driven by his commitment to serve others. Enlisting at the age of 18 in 2000, his original plan was to complete three years of service. However, the tragic events of September 11 shifted his purpose. “Giving back to the nation is what kept me here,” he shared, reflecting on the deep sense of duty that continues to fuel his career.
This dedication came with significant sacrifices, especially in his family life. Over the years, Chris missed countless important moments—birthdays, anniversaries, and the small, everyday experiences that create cherished memories. “Time is a precious commodity that you can’t get back,” Chris acknowledged. These sacrifices are common in the Special Operations Forces (SOF) community, where the demands of service often take priority over family time. Despite these challenges, Chris has learned the importance of prioritizing his relationships while continuing to excel in his career. “When it’s all said and done, you want to look to the left and to the right when you’re holding that retirement flag, and your family is still there intact,” he explained.
The Role of OHF Therapeutic Retreats in Strengthening Families
For Chris and his wife, Sherita, an Operation Healing Forces (OHF) retreat came at the perfect time to focus on their relationship. While Chris had long been an advocate for OHF, encouraging younger service members to attend the retreats, he hadn’t taken the opportunity for himself until recently. After stepping into a new, demanding role, he realized the need to take a step back and reconnect with his wife. With Chris Stowe guiding their experience, the Millers embraced a week of therapeutic activities, including a hot air balloon adventure that pushed them out of their comfort zones. “We are both terrified of heights,” Chris admitted, “but we got up there, and it was so peaceful, it was quiet.”
Beyond the unique experiences, the retreat offered something even more impactful—time. Having an entire week together, free from distractions, allowed Chris and Sherita to strengthen their bond. They also formed meaningful connections with other couples in the SOF community. While the wives quickly bonded, Chris observed that the Operators took a bit more time to open up. “I think it’s in our SOF culture—we like to see who’s in the room first,” he explained. However, by the end of the week, barriers were broken, and deeper conversations emerged. “We were bro-hugging, exchanging emails, and connecting on LinkedIn,” Chris shared.
The retreat also provided a sense of validation for the Millers. “All of the couples that were there, we all experienced the same stressors, but we all agreed that we are overcomers,” Chris said. “When you go back home and talk to your family or friends, if they are not in this community, they don’t understand it. It’s a different lifestyle. The retreat was confirmation that all the couples are experiencing it—we are not in this alone. OHF provided that opportunity to help tackle it along with others who experience it too.”
For the Millers, the retreat was more than a break; it was a chance to rebuild their connection and renew their resilience. By fostering trust, understanding, and shared experiences, OHF retreats and military family support continue to be a lifeline for Special Operations Forces families, providing the most valuable gift of all—time.
